


finally have it all

by alxxring



Series: CRANKIPLIER smut [8]
Category: Crankiplier - Fandom
Genre: Friends With Benefits, Gay, Gay Sex, It’s not really smut, Kissing, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Tagging sucks, ok enjoy <3, they’re such crackheads lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-13
Updated: 2020-06-13
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:07:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24702796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alxxring/pseuds/alxxring
Summary: it’s friends with benefits but... you throw in some harbored feelings and things are no longer so friendly
Relationships: Mark Fischbach/Ethan Nestor
Series: CRANKIPLIER smut [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1734367
Comments: 21
Kudos: 186





	finally have it all

Friends with benefits but with feeling lol. 

Also its so long RIP I’m so sorry nshsishsj you don’t have to read it. . 

. 

-

“Hurts?” Mark strained, struggling to keep his hips from bucking up.

“N-no. so…” the boy couldn’t form words fast enough, and he bit his lip to keep his loud moan from spilling out.

“Fuck, it’s good. Its really good, baby.” Ethan finally gave in when mark started pushing his throbbing dick in and out, going slow for now.

Mark's heart stuttered when Ethan called him “baby.”

God, what was wrong with him lately? Sex was always great with Ethan, but it’s not like he ever felt anything more other than physical attraction. Hot skin was hot skin, to paraphrase his thoughts, and all this fluttery bullshit was starting to aggravate him. 

He could  _ not  _ be gaining some stupid crush on some stupid boy, RIGHT NOW. 

But That was quickly forgotten as Ethan buried Marks face into his chest, simply because if he looked he’d cum way too fast. Mark went with it though, sucking deep red marks that would definitely be a pretty shade of purple by tomorrow...

Now that they had told everyone about their arrangement, they could Show up all bruised with no question. 

Soon enough though, Ethan started to get whiny because Mark wasn’t being rough enough for his liking. The boy felt full, spent on the thickness of marks member, whimpering when mark listened in going harder. 

At this point, every muscle in his body was turning into mush, it felt like. Ethan could barely keep his eyes on the ceiling, letting mark come up from the crook of his neck while he was too busy losing every coherent thought. 

He decided his moans were too loud and embarrassing for him, and he tried quieting them by pulling mark down to kiss him, moaning and whimpering into the man’s mouth with an unknown intimacy that petrified Mark, he knew doing that would only dig him farther into trouble, but he almost yearned for more when Ethan fervently chased his lips. He had to do something else to keep his heart from bursting, so he shifted to brush it off as a comfort thing, but...

  
  


“ _ Yes.”  _ Ethan breathed into Mark's shoulder when the bigger man pounded into  _ that  _ spot, 

And Ethan couldn’t remember how to work his fingers, so they sat there, spasming at Mark's shoulders. 

“There.” Was all the boy could whimper, desperately needing something to grab on to. Mark knew how Ethan was during sex like this and offered his hand. 

The way that Ethan only brought his partner's fingers into his mouth, successfully stifling his moans, made the man woozy with even more lust than he thought possible. 

He really started to take Ethan in. The smooth chest, and beautifully wrecked facial expression, downing Marks fingers like the slut that he was. He saw how his eyes rolled back every now and then, and he felt ethans hamstring start to spasm whenever Mark pounded hard enough that the bed moved its spot on the carpeted floor. 

He wanted to have this sight available to him… forever. And he didn’t want  _ anyone  _ else to see this. But that was… possessiveness… and he had no right. 

No, no, no… he told himself. 

But it was too late. 

Because that was when he realized… he didn’t just do this because he and Ethan had amazingly good sex, he did this because he  _ wanted  _ Ethan. He wanted  _ all  _ of Ethan. 

Mark also didn’t want anyone else to have the pleasure of seeing Ethan like this, of Ethan kissing anyone but him, holding anyone that wasn’t the one and only great markiplier, and… then he realized. 

He liked him. A lot. That was maybe the scariest part. 

-

Ever since that horrible fucking realization, Mark really didn’t know how to go about this. After the event, he sat there with Ethan on his arm, drooling onto his bed. Ethan was naked and clean because Mark made sure to clean them and change the sheets… he knew how much the boy hated sleeping on cum stained sheets. 

But the bigger man sat there, contemplating. 

Should he tell Ethan? Should he distance himself? 

Every scenario for every possibility, he thought of. Mark was scared, and the fact that he was scared, that fact  _ terrified  _ him. 

When Ethan woke up the next day, he gave Mark a blowjob, before going into their bathroom- before going into  _ Mark’s  _ bathroom to cover up the Hickeys he had gotten as they had to film today. It was so… domestic. And the way that Ethan looked at him when Mark got up to put on clothes sent tidal wave after tidal wave of these warm and fuzzy feelings he had never associated with the boy. 

“I’ll call Tyler over.” The boy said, instead of mentioning anything about the way that he looked at his friend, and slipped on Mark's shirt from the day before, It was clean enough, and he threw on some sweatpants from his room. 

“You gonna make breakfast though?”

“Eth, it’s two in the afternoon.”

They both made heavy eye contact before Ethan put the phone up to his ear without breaking the stare. 

“Your point?”

Yet when Mark went to tell him his point, Tyler was already heard from the other end of the phone. 

“What’s up, bub?”

He heard and didn’t quite like that. 

So the bigger man had no choice but to agree. 

-

“Mark, helppp!!” Ethan whined, he could hear the frustration in the boys’ voice. 

Ethan had been trying to get something they needed for the video, and Tyler wouldn’t help because he was  _ too tall for it to be fair,  _ according to himself. 

When Mark walked in, Ethan was really trying to reach, and Mark just walked up close behind him, pulling the object down. 

The boy underneath paused for a second, before relaxing and getting down from his tippy toes. In the process, he brushed against Marks groin, but chose to think that it wasn’t a big deal. Because it really wasn’t. If he could suck his dick, he could accidentally rub against his friend. 

“Thanks.” he breathily sighed out, rolling his neck from side to side. It hurt after looking up for almost twenty minutes. Mark still stood behind him, admiring the taut skin of his neck, the redness and slightly purple-ish hue it had from one of their bedroom endeavors a few nights ago, and he had heard Tyler laughing about it earlier. Mark wanted Tyler to watch one day, to watch as he so assertively claimed Ethan as  _ his.  _ That thought alone gave him the sudden urge to kiss him senseless. It came so fast and so hard, it burned up his throat, knocking him breathless--- which he offhandedly decided was not supposed to be a thing. He was  _ not  _ supposed to want to kiss his best friend in front of his other best friend just to prove a point.

Yet the urge grew strong enough to send that pleasant thrum down his stomach when Ethan turned around to give Tyler a cocky smile, which the bigger male was standing a little just behind Mark, to which  _ mark  _ said “fuck it” and kissed Ethan with enough force to knock his head onto the cupboard door. The smaller frame hummed, appreciatively feeling up the mans arms, and laughing when tyler shrieked with disgust, desperately screaming “fucks sake, get a room.”

He liked the warm fuzzy feeling too much, and he decided officially…

Kissing Ethan was no longer an option.

-

Their hands intertwined for warmth, and Ethan curled in slightly more to Marks forearm. 

“Why did we decide to watch the sunrise this early?” He shuddered, humming contently when Mark tiredly soothed a hand down his back. 

The sun had just started to come up, casting the prettiest glimmer of gold onto Locks of honey hair, reflecting off of his pale skin. It was so sinful the way Ethan could look so gorgeous without trying. He layed a shivery kiss onto the bigger man’s forearm, questioning himself- questioning why this felt so normal. 

He started to ramble on about how  _ annoying  _ it was to go out to clubs with tyler, because all girls did was “tyler  _ this  _ and- tyler  _ that.”  _ A few times, he even slipped in some self deprecation that earned him soft tugs on his hair. 

“And it’s just like- hey, I don’t want your std’s or anything but also… I mean, I like  _ attention.”  _ It was so like Ethan to spew a joke out in that way, enjoying the way that Mark peppered feather kisses onto his forehead, to say “here’s your attention.”

The bigger man relished that giggle. Because- fuck. If that wasn’t the cutest thing he’d probably have to commit arson. 

“Remember that shrek song?”

“Sure.”

And the brunette looked up softly, making eye contact, trailing an almost teasing hand up and down his friends thigh. 

This was so soft, so domestic, so pretty, and Mark didn’t ever want it to end. 

But hey- woah- okay, no. Fuck, no. His mouth dried at his own self indulgence. 

“And remember my degree in bad pickup lines?”

“Sure.” Oh boy, did he. 

“Well,” Ethan looked away shyly, still rubbing that small but strong hand on Marks thigh, though it seemed like a bit of a distraction, so the man stopped it. Only to interlace their fingers again, resting it there. The action made Ethan groan, laying his head on that broad chest once more, watching the rising sun. 

“You’re my all star, dude.”

And if things like that were going to be said whenever they did this again,  _ if  _ they ever did this again, it made it so redundantly clear that he just wanted  _ this.  _

His heart started to do funny things as he realized that he wanted Ethan. He wanted kids and dogs and those deliciously warm pancakes the boy would make, just for Mark on busy sundays. 

It…. honest to god, terrified him. It made him want to run, to never come back. Yet every cell of skin screamed to be in the boys arms, if he were to run it would have to be  _ with him,  _ never  _ from him.  _

God, Mark was fucked. 

—

It was the little things. 

The little things that would make Ethan want to curl up into a ball and never unravel. 

Like when Mark would uninterlock their fingers, make excuses to not  _ touch _ . 

It was always: “it’s been a hard day, I’m just tired,” and when he’d insisted that his intentions weren’t anything sexual, Mark would shrug. It wasn’t like he’d never called Marks emotions or anything, so he just  _ knew  _ it was something deeper. 

Or when he moved away from the boys soft caresses, not opening up to the brunette when asked. 

It set Ethan for a loop. 

A miserable, and insecure loop. 

….

One night, 

His hands tensed on Mark’s sternum, squirming around, trying his hardest to keep his suffocating moans on the bigger mans skin. Supposedly that was supposed to keep him quiet.

It didn’t work, though, and he desperately seeked out Mark’s lips, only to have them pulled away.

Which was enough to shell shock him.

Mark had never, not  _ once,  _ pulled away before this strange occurrence, And he had been avoiding kissing Ethan for at least two months now. It made his heart pound unsurely, seeing as there wasn’t even a small teasing smile to reassure him that it was a joke. That had been the last straw for the boy, and he had desperately tried not to dwell on it. Even days after, he had ran out of excuses to tell himself.

It was frustrating him. And it wasn’t like he could go and just  _ tell  _ mark how scared this was making him. 

So Ethan set a goal for himself. He told himself “maybe Mark wants a break from pampering me as much as he does” and he in return tried to get him every chance he was given.

When Mark seemed stressed, he’d listen to his problems before giving him a nice and long blow job. In the mornings, he’d wake the man up with breakfast in bed, still having Mark pull away when he’d lean down for a kiss. He’d set up the cameras, he would offer to make thumbnails, or even edit entire videos.

The boy did everything, in desperation for mark to at least give him  _ one  _ kiss, something to reassure him. The feelings he was harbouring were panicking, and he himself was panicking. He could only hope that Mark just wanted more from him, and maybe that was the reason for what was happening. He pleaded, and begged to whatever force that was supposed to be up in the sky.

He prayed that mark still wanted this.

...

To say that the bigger man didn’t enjoy this was a lie. But he also knew that Ethans overly intense pampering and libido was making him fall harder each day.

Seriously, it made it so much harder not to tackle him with sweet nothings and praises when his boy would pull that hurt expression whenever denied a kiss. 

So eventually, he came to the decision that Ethan should spend more time… away. Maybe… at his house. And only come over when necessary. Definately not the best thing to do, and definitely n

“Hey.” Ethan smiled to Mark when he came home that day from spending time with Mika.

“Mika says hi, by the way,” and he set his keys onto the rack, leaving his shoes by the door before actually emerging into the living room.

“Want me to make dinner?”

“We should talk first.”

That sat an insecurity deep into Ethans chest, but he decided to nod and sit down next to Mark like he wasn't internally panicking.

“So… i was thinking… that you should stay home more…”

The boy stared, willing away the lump forming in his throat.

“Like, at  _ your  _ house-” yeah, dipshit. Where else? “And not stay over as much.” That cut through the air and stayed suspended as they both waited for a move. Anything, mark asked.  _ Anything.  _

  
  
  


“Uh-uhm….did something happen? Did  _ i  _ do something-”

He didn’t want to leave, and he felt embarrassed when his mouth formed into that signature frown, tears already leaping down his cheeks.

“I mean i’ll go if you want me to. D-do i have to take everything-” he paused to wipe his eyes and let out a soft, anxious chuckle.

“Or do you want me to go  _ now-”  _

“Why are you crying…” the bigger man almost wined, because fucks sake- he wanted to cry, too. Ethan wasn’t supposed to be this cute, or be this polite.

“I don't understand.” Ethan heaved as a response, caving in on himself as he folded his hand down onto his knees.

“I guess i knew this was coming, but i just-” he choked out before letting out a heart wenching sob.

“I didn’t understand why you wouldn’t kiss me, or treat me like you used to, and when i tried to give you everything to get  _ anything  _ back, i just got less and less every time!” it was almost incoherent from how fast he was spewing it out in panic, but not exactly, because Mark was sitting there and trying to keep his own emotions at bay.

The boy started to sob like a widow. 

His emotional display was just so… heart breaking. The way those pretty fingers gripped his hoodie, and the way he clawed at his face as if he were trying to hide or make the tears disappear. 

“I don’t want any of this to be  _ gone-“ _

“It won’t be, Ethan-“

“Don’t say that!” He nearly screamed through his sob, holding up a hand when he felt soft hands on his arms. 

“You  _ can’t  _ say that when all you’re doing is pushing me away!”

Ethan sniffed hard, his anguish seemingly replaced by anger. 

“ ‘it’s been a hard day,’ ‘I’m tired.” He mocked, grabbing the stuffed animal he had placed on the t.v stand. The one he had told Mark was his favorite, and it was to be given to his favorite person. He held it between his stomach and forearm, sniffling angrily. 

“Just  _ talk  _ to me, Mark. You could have done that. But no. No. You know—“

His small frame stomped around, picking up the special objects he had laying around for Mark, and when he said those last two words he turned around to The man. The man that was now standing in Alert, feeling his heart break within knowing that he would no longer have lovely reminders of how much Ethan  _ loved  _ him. 

“You know, I love you. And you know that. But I just love you  _ so _ much, so much I tried fooling myself you loved me to-“

“But I do!”

And Ethan paused. He could see the huge breath he took. 

“No. You know what I want? I want you. Everything with  _ you.  _ I want Saturday mornings, and watching sunrises because  _ those  _ are your favorite. I want you to come back from work and kiss me like you did before, I want to see your face when you eat those fucking pancakes, and your face when I say I love you. And yeah- I know. We weren’t… a thing. But I just- I don’t know, Mark- I  _ wanted  _ that so bad.”

The bigger man’s heart tightened more and more at the words, the words that were steadily painting a very beautiful picture. 

His frame looked so wrecked as he struggled to keep in the tears welling at his eyes, and Mark watched his Adam’s apple bob with each harsh sniff and swallow. He kept blubbering through those pretty alligator tears, trying to push the man away as he dutifully walked closer. 

“ _ Please-“ _

But he found himself no longer speaking. Marks lips were hungrily ravishing him, yet his hands were tenderly rubbing soft circles on his lower back with his huge and firm hands. 

It was the first kiss and real touch after  _ months  _ of deprivation. How was he not supposed to melt? That’s exactly what he did, though. The items he held fell to the floor, hands hesitantly tracing skin and that incredibly tight shirt Mark was wearing. 

The boy let himself enjoy it, let himself push away the pain and the doubt that this meant something, and he pulled his friend closer. Because it felt… right. God- it was so right. He even had to hold back his groan of protest when mark leaned back. 

But it wasn’t in his traditional fashion of kissing and moving on to do something else- no. He stayed. He stared, he brought his thumb up to rub that incredibly soft bottom lip that belonged to Ethan, and he dove back in for another tender kiss. 

Through the kiss, The brunette boldly said “this cant mean nothing. It has to mean something.”

Only to his heart nearly leap out of his chest when the man pushed him against the wall. 

“It means  _ everything. _ ”

So that meant no more words would be spoken. He was so scared it was a bluff that he let himself sink into that fear and give in to everything the love of his life wanted to do. 

Hands tugging at hair and even bigger hands lifting him up by his thighs, rutting up for  _ anything  _ because fucks sake they were so turned on, and if that meant Ethan would keep moaning down into his mouth the way he did, he wouldn’t be able to control himself. The intimacy that scared him before was back, yet this time it made his heart swell. 

It was all so freeing, and he meant it, more than he’d ever meant anything, when he said: “I love you so much.” In the most desperate way. It was filled with Lust and hunger, but powered by admiration and those strong ass feelings he’d been trying to push away. 

Ethan. He’d been trying to push away ethan. 

But now, he only pulled that beautiful boy closer, enjoying each touch that set his skin on fire. 

And though it wasn’t spoken, it was so very and finally clear, they had eachother . 

They could have pancakes and dogs and kids and those beautiful Sunday mornings. 

They now had it all. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Hey!!! Please leave prompts or kinks or literally ANYTHING you want to see! 
> 
> Requests open, I’d love to see them <3


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